To My Parents..

Hi friends,

Growing up, I was very much sheltered. As an only child, I was raised to fear the world outside. My parents did a great job raising me, and I’m forever grateful for that. But I’d like to gently say to current and future parents: please don’t be too strict with your children. Show them that you trust them by allowing small forms of freedom. Freedom doesn’t have to mean saying yes to every party or sleepover. It can be as simple as letting them take the lead at a young age whether it’s ordering food on your behalf, making them talk to the bank tellers, learning how to fix something at home and etc. These early chances to explore build confidence and shape interests. I never really had that opportunity. My parents only knew one route: Doctor. Did I become one? No. Is that okay? Yes, absolutely. But that constant pressure to become something I didn’t connect with, chipped away at my confidence and limited my curiosity about other paths. That’s one of my biggest pet peeves, aside from the usual things we know, like how emotions often go unacknowledged. Strict parenting isn’t inherently bad but please tune in to your child’s feelings and give them space to grow.

To the kiddos: please stay connected with your parents as much as you can. Even if it’s just a quick 3 minute call: “Hi, yes I ate, yes I’m studying, bye.” It still means the world to them. I recently lost both of my parents. At first, I thought, “I wish I had said ‘I love you’ more, or told them I cared.” But then I remembered that I did show them love, through my actions. I cared for them the way a daughter should. I was there when they were mad at each other. I showed up when they needed me. And if you’ve ever had arguments or said things in the heat of the moment, please don’t carry guilt for that. Your emotions and your feelings were valid. That doesn’t take away from the love you had or still have for them. Don’t define your love just through words. Physical presence and small acts of care speak just as loudly. Cherish your parents. One day, they’re just… gone. Appreciate them in whatever way fits your family’s way of expressing love. I miss mine deeply. And even though I felt restricted at times, they did an amazing job raising me. (Not just my opinion-people often praise the way I was brought up, lol.) I truly believe I became a good person because of how they raised me. In summary: strict parenting can work, but only if paired with emotional awareness and trust. And kids-check in on your parents, no matter how old you or they are. Be grateful for your life and the time you still have with them.

Sincerely,

A proud daughter